The Myth of Arrival
I spent much of my life in motion. From the place of my youth, I departed, convinced that somewhere beyond the familiar horizon lay the fulfillment I sought. Each new place promised reinvention. Each departure felt like an act of faith. I believed that happiness waited just ahead, disguised as accomplishment. And so I kept moving.
There were moments when I thought I had found it. A promotion. A friendship. A romance. A hard-won achievement. For a time, each seemed to confirm that I was finally arriving at the life I was meant to live. And yet, the feeling never lasted. Like a traveler chasing the last light of evening, I glimpsed satisfaction on the horizon, only to find it retreating each time I drew near. What I mistook for a destination was merely another mile marker on an endless road.
Now that I face the end of my journey where no maps are needed and no future beckons, I find myself looking back over the landscape of my life, and I understand my journey was never truly from place to place. It was an inward search carried outward, driven by the hope that achievement would quiet the restless belief that I was somehow unfinished. I mistook accomplishment for belonging and confused success with self-acceptance.
I recall the roads traveled, the risks taken, the dreams pursued, and I wonder how often I overlooked what was already present. How many beautiful mornings did I hurry through? How many acts of love did I receive too casually? How many quiet moments of contentment escaped my notice because I was so intent on becoming someone else?
My regret is not that I failed to reach every summit. No life is large enough for that. My regret is that I believed fulfillment belonged somewhere beyond the life I was already living. And so, I am left with a melancholy understanding. While I searched distant horizons for the person I hoped to become, life itself unfolded with patient generosity, asking only to be noticed before memory became all that remained.
Copyright © 2026 Frank Zahn. Published in the Adelaide Literary Magazine, Number 93, September 2026, https://adelaidemagazine.org/the-myth-of-arrival.